“The one good thing about being car-less is that on the bus on my way to work, I can plug my headphones into my iPad while it’s safely in my purse and listen to all the wonderful tunes Christian has given me.”—
“The song ends and tears spring to my eyes. I quickly scroll to another —“The Scientist” by Coldplay—one of Kate’s favorite bands. I know the track, but I’ve never really listened to the lyrics before.”—
tonight i’m going to be going to the 50 shades of pleasure workshop at the pleasure chest in weho. i will be live tweeting with it- follow me @50shadesofsuck. i will be standing by the industrial size lube.
“Hanging on the far wall are seven huge portraits—of me. I stare blankly at them, stupefied, the blood draining from my face. Me: pouting, laughing, scowling, serious, amused. All in super close up, all in black and white.”—
“There’s an ethereal beauty to many of the landscapes. In one taken out near the lake at Vancouver, it’s early evening and pink clouds are reflected in the stillness of the water. Briefly, I’m transported by the tranquility and the peace. It’s stunning.”—
“And a big shout out to all the wonderful, wonderful women from all over the world whom I have had the pleasure of meeting since I started all this, and whom I now consider friends, including: Ale, Alex, Amy, Andrea, Angela, Azucena, Babs, Bee, Belinda, Betsy, Brandy, Britt, Caroline, Catherine, Dawn, Gwen, Hannah, Janet, Jen, Jenn, Jill, Kathy, Katie, Kellie, Kelly, Liz, Mandy, Margaret, Natalia, Nicole, Nora, Olga, Pam, Pauline, Raina, Raizie, Rajka, Rhian, Ruth, Steph, Susi, Tasha, Taylor and Una. And also to the many, many talented, funny, warm women (and men) I have met online. You know who you are.”—
Acknowledgements, Fifty Shades Darker.
i’d also like to thank Bella, Edward, Carlyle, Jacob, Stephanie, Anna, Ana, Anne, Annie, Art, Arty, Marty, Farty, Party, Party Hats, Hats (all types), Shirts, Bras, Pants, Gloves, Muffs (teehee), and Anal Beads.
so i finished book one. it ends on a cliffhanger. to recap: anastasia dares christian to do his worst, in order to gauge if she can really be in this relationship, and he whips her with a leather belt six times (i would have other uses for a belt and anastasia)(i’m talking about a noose)(murder). anastasia doesn’t like getting hit by the belt and she decides to leave christian. then she gives back the audi and macbook he gave her (rookie mistake) and goes home to cry.
wow. really good stuff there. deep and poignant and meaningful. i’ll start book two next week. i initially started blogging about halfway through it, so once i get the the masquerade ball, that’s where i leave you!
anyway, have a great weekend and take tons of tequila shots because tequila is an upper and all other forms of alcohol are downers.*
*fun fact my mother told me that i’m not sure is true.
“Well, you are one fucked-up son of a bitch.”
“Ana,” he pleads, shocked.
“Don’t you dare ‘Ana’ me! You need to sort your shit out, Grey!” And with that, I turn stiffly, and I walk out of the playroom, closing the door quietly behind me.”—
Fifty Shades of Grey, p. 366.
maybe you should have said this before you let him whip you with a belt?
“Well, I think the contract is moot, don’t you?” His voice is low and husky, his eyes soft.
“Moot.” He smiles. I gape at him quizzically.
“But you were so keen.”
“Well, that was before. Anyway, the Rules aren’t moot, they still stand.” His expression hardens slightly.
“Before? Before what?”
“Before…” He pauses, and the wary expression is back. “More.” He shrugs.
Fifty Shades of Grey, p. 360.
WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY EVEN TALKING ABOUT? this isn’t english.
“I thought you were going to make me giggle after sex; this isn’t doing it fo me.”
His lips quirk up.
“I can’t tell jokes.”
“Mr. Grey! Something you can’t do?” I grin at him, and he grins back.
“No, hopeless joke teller.” He looks so proud of himself that I start to giggle.
“I’m a hopeless joke teller, too.”—
Fifty Shades of Grey, p. 357.
the fact that this book is devoid of humor is nothing to be proud of.
“…the heavenly choir all singing different parts, their voices blending blissfully and sweetly together in a melodic harmony that is beyond anything I’ve ever heard. I catch one word — ‘deus’— and I realize they are singing in Latin.”—
“he reveals his iPod in his hand, “you will not be able to hear me. All you will hear is the music I am going to play for you.”
Okay. A musical interlude. Not what I was expecting. Does he ever do what I expect? Jeez, I hope it’s not rap.”—
Fifty Shades of Grey, p. 352.
rap hopes it’s not rap either. it wants no part of this.
“Could you put some music on, please?”
“Certainly, ma’am. What would you like to hear?”
I see a smile play on Taylor’s lips as our eyes meet briefly again in the mirror.
He pushes a few buttons on the steering wheel, and the gentle strains of Pachelbel’s canon fills the space between us.”—
“I have never seen him like this, and it’s a joy to behold. I find myself walking beside him, hand in hand, with a stupid, goofy grin plastered on my face. It reminds me of when I was ten and spent the day in Disneyland with Ray. It was a perfect day, and this is sure shaping out to be the same.”—
Fifty Shades of Grey, p. 330.
except Ray (your step dad) didn’t pull your tampon out and fuck you on the rag…or did he? would explain A LOT.
“I remember that I have my period.
“I’m bleeding,” I murmur.
“Doesn’t bother me,” he breathes.
“I noticed.” I can’t keep the dryness out of my voice.
He tenses slightly.
“Does it bother you?” he asks softly.
Does it bother me? Maybe it should… should it? No, it doesn’t.”—
Fifty Shades of Grey, p. 311.
well it bothers me as i dont want to read about it.
“Will it always be like this? So overwhelming, so all-consuming, so bewildering and beguiling. I wanted to talk, but now I’m spent and dazed from his lovemaking and wondering if I will ever get enough of him?”—
“He reaches between my legs and pulls on the blue string – what?! – and gently pulls my tampon out and tosses it into the nearby toilet. Holy fuck.”—
Fifty Shades of Grey, p. 311.
ok so guys, what I don’t get is WHY WAS THIS EVEN INCLUDED? like, why did e.l. james feel like she had to write about period sex? all it’s doing is grossing everyone out. i have nothing AGAINST period sex, but i think we can all agree it isn’t the most ideal thing in the world. this is an erotic novel…NOVEL, and since i’ve read all three i know that anastasia having her period right now in no way effects the storyline.
are we just supposed to see how sexually liberated christian is? i mean, he isn’t. it’s not like he’s earning his redwings.
“Are you bleeding?” He continues to kiss me.
Holy Fuck. Does nothing slip by him?
“Yes,” I whisper, embarrassed.
“Do you have cramps?”
“No.” I flush. Jeez…
He stops and looks down at me.
“Did you take your pill?”
“Yes.” How mortifying is this?
“Let’s go have a bath.”—
“Darling, don’t feel you have to come back with me. I want you happy – and right now I think the key to your happiness is upstairs in room 612… If you stay – well… you’re a big girl now. Just be safe.”
I flush stars and stripes red. Jeez, Mom.
“Let’s finish our Cosmos first.”
“That’s my girl, Ana.” She grins.”—
Fifty Shades of Grey, p. 307.
i wish this book was about anastasia’s mom, she sounds way cooler than her daughter.